The Eight Sentences:
The sidewalk leading up to the street was broken and uneven. Grass and tall weeds made homes of the cracks. Poison ivy grew up the side of an exterior wall, rooted somewhere between a window and the brick veneer wall.
But the interior was another story.
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| Image copyright 2007 FCEtier |
The floors were worn but clean. It was clear that the kitchen and dining area had been used recently and frequently. A mahogany bar hosted a row of bar stools from another era. The back counter was stocked with bourbon and scotch.
The American flag stood proudly with an eagle decoration atop the wooden staff.
The Back Story:
Last week's snippet was my first dealing with the League of Old Men. Today, we visit their meeting hall.
This will be my last excerpt on this eclectic group who will make their debut in my third book, A Year Without Killing.
This will be my last excerpt on this eclectic group who will make their debut in my third book, A Year Without Killing.
These guys will turn up again in my fourth book, Transfer the Dragon. They will be joined in this adventure by the talented and feisty members of the Presidents Club.
Open call for writers:
Join us here at Weekend Writing Warriors. The
same link will take you to the work of dozens of talented
writers.
Check out their work, too. Here's the Facebook link for the
Sunday Snippett group.
Very nice descriptions. I'm also quite impressed that you've got it planned that far ahead. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks Elena.
DeleteI wish my writing could keep pace with my ideas and plans.
I like the dichotomy of the outer images to the inner. Nicely done, Frank. :)
ReplyDeleteGreat descriptions. Very visual -- I can see the sidewalk and the interior.
ReplyDeleteI like the contrast between the interior and the exterior of the house. It's like telling: "don't judge a book by its cover."
ReplyDeleteI do like the description a lot too. It gives me strong mental pictures, except when you mention the flag; you don't say where it is in the room. Is it in a floor stand or on the wall? Whereabouts in the room? It interrupts the easy visualization of the rest of the snippet. It's an easy fix, if you decide to do it. Thanks for sharing this bit with us :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for pointing that out. I will address it.
DeleteThese are the perfect digs for the League, Chip. And the poison ivy is a nice touch (pun not intended). :)
ReplyDeleteQuite a dichotomy between the exterior and the interior. Almost seems as if it's a test, to see who will persevere and get into the inner sanctum. Enjoyed it, I like your League of Old Men. Great snippet, very visual and left me thinking....
ReplyDeleteThe line about Grass and tall weeds made homes of the cracks. really grabbed me. I love the contrast between the inside and outside.
ReplyDeleteLove the imagery! Could see it perfectly.
ReplyDeleteWonderful descriptions, makes it very real. I love the difference between the exterior and the interior.
ReplyDeleteI like how you build your world, Frank. It sets the mood, too!
ReplyDeleteGood visual imagery. It sets up whatever is about to unfold very well.
ReplyDeleteI agree great imagery. Wishing you the best and much success.
ReplyDeleteJuneta at Writer's Gambit