Saturday, November 3, 2012

Nov. 4 Six Sentence Sunday


The Setup:
     The Tourist Killer opens as Claudia Barry, elite professional assassin, completes an assignment. At age sixty-two, she has enjoyed a career that has spanned over thirty years.  She had to start somewhere. In this scene, she reacts to her first kill.  

SIX SENTENCES:

She quickly made her way to Bourbon Street.
Anyone who noticed her now would see a twenty-something female in short shorts and a cut off Ohio State t-shirt.
The aroma on Bourbon Street was a combination of rotting garbage, beer, urine and vomit. Claudia was overcome by weakness. She held onto a light post to keep her balance. Then, her knees buckled and she made a contribution to the nauseating fragrance that tourists associate with the French Quarter.

Pictured above is "Pirates Alley" as seen from behind the St. Louis Cathedral. Beyond the cathedral lies Jackson Square. In The Tourist Killer, someone who appears to be a young man, murders a retired New Orleans policeman in this alley. (Image credit, Wikicommons)

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15 comments:

  1. Your writing gets better every time I read it. I love the passage.

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  2. Keep reading then!
    Thanks for the comment.

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  3. wonderful six. I know that smell and I can clearly see her holding onto that light post weak in the knees. I also love the visual imagery. Very well done!

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  4. Thanks Jamie.
    I've experienced that aroma in one other place: Chinatown in Lower Manhattan.
    I appreciate your comment!

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  5. Excellent description, very vivid. You make me glad I'm not where she's at. I could smell that. ewww. lol

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    1. Maybe I should have marked my post as NSFMT (not safe for meal time)!

      Thanks for the comment Joanne.

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  6. Caleb is right, each week your snippets become steadily more compelling. I love the descriptiveness of this snippet. The picture is beautiful as well. You're on a roll.

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    1. Thanks Jess.
      I appreciate you comments each week.
      I'm hoping to get a few snippets on SSS before it ends in Jan.

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  7. I love the imagery of Bourbon Street and the French Quarter (Never been to New Orleans, myself). You know your subject well, and succeed in conveying it to the reader. Nice job!

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    1. New Orleans is a great place to visit and my wife and I have been there many times. Great memories of "pre-Katrina" NOLA.
      Thanks for the comment, Frank.

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  8. Very intense. her work bothered her at first. Love the pic of New Orleans. We went there a few years ago for the first time.

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    1. Thanks for your comment Elaine. Yes, she was initially bothered. She got over it. Your comment reminded me of a great line from the first review on Amazon.

      "it is left to the reader to decide if she is a do-gooder ridding society of undesirables or a psychopath taking out the trash."

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  9. Great descriptive sentences, really drew the reader in.

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    1. Thanks for stopping by and for commenting, S E.

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  10. Great description.

    I love how you described the stench as an aroma!

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